We had minute rice and kielbasa sausage with sautéed bell peppers for dinner. Such a simple, small town kinda meal…but it’s a favorite; possibly because of my slight obsession with rice? Why doesn’t really matter. It’s good. That’s what matters. And it’s what I was eating when I received an email that could potentially change the rest of my life. Forever.
Here we are. Round 1 of the wait and see roller coaster of possibly being matched with a Birth Mother. The last few hours are a huge blur of “Breathe. Don’t cry. Breathe. Pray. Breathe. Relax. Pray. Don’t cry. Breathe. HOLY…I DON’T KNOW WHAT!!! Oh..breathe.”
I think I’ve explained this a little in the past, but basically, once we were approved, our profile book became available to Love Basket’s Birth Parent Counselors. They show profile books to clients who match a particular set of profile criteria with potential adoptive parents. As of my last post, our book was collecting dust because we didn’t match with anyone needing to look at profile books.
Every month we receive a newsletter that keeps us up to date on clients, placements, and all related information. We are still awaiting March’s newsletter, but tonight, we received an email about a “Special Situation” client. Basically, if a child/birth parent’s situation is not “perfect” (both consenting parents, no drug or alcohol involved, healthy mom, healthy baby, everything is unicorns and rainbows, butterflies, and roses….) the client is considered a “Special Situation” client. With these clients, an email is sent to all awaiting families and it includes everything the agency knows about the Birth Mother, her baby and their entire situation. Based on that email, we (the adoptive parents) decide whether or not we want our profile shown to this specific client. Examples from past emails include a baby with a severe bone disease (osteogenesis imperfecta), a baby with severe fetal alcohol exposure, etc.
From the moment we receive information about a Birth Mother’s situation, we are entrusted with very private, personal information-information that could very well be the beginning of OUR baby’s life story. The nature of our relationship with our future Birth Mother, her pregnancy journey, and our Baby’s beginning days of life are extremely intimate…for all of us. We fully believe in respecting our child’s privacy as well as our Birth Mother’s. The details we receive through the agency will be details we carefully share with only those who absolutely need particular details. Otherwise, we plan to give our child first dibs on the very beginning details of his or her life story. And we will leave it up to our child to decide who they share that information with. An example of this would be us adopting a child we know was conceived through sexual abuse. Such a detail is the last thing we want our child to over hear someone talking about. I don’t want to sit our child down to tell them details of their story only to be asked, “Does everybody already know?” and have to say, “Well, yes.” That being said….the email we received tonight contained a bit of news that we CAN share openly and excitedly.
The number one detail (in my opinion) that makes this client a “Special Situation” client is that she already had her baby! Right now, in Missouri-our home state, is a baby who’s Birth Mother has contacted Love Basket and requested their services in creating an adoption plan. Baby Girl is four days old and needs a Mommy and a Daddy to take her home and love her to pieces! After careful consideration of other details surrounding her story, Adam and I have chosen to have our profile shown to this child’s Birth Mother.
Each “Special Situation” email comes with a deadline. This one is tomorrow (Wednesday March 20, 2013) at 4pm. I’ve already emailed LB and told them we are interested in this client and her baby. I’m not sure when the Birth Mother will review profiles, but I plan to call the agency tomorrow with a small list of questions (Who? Me? A list? A 1000 questions? SO unlike me, I know…)
My head is spinning. I’m feeling a thousand emotions and thinking a thousand and one thoughts and I wanted to stop long enough to record the details of the moment and keep everyone posted.
Please pray for God’s hand to be in control of all that happens in this situation. We ask that he guide this particular Birth Mother in her choosing adoptive parents for her child. We ask that Baby Girl remain safe in her temporary home and that regardless of our fate in this scenario…that God wrap his arms around ALL of us and surround us with PEACE.
I will keep everyone posted as things move forward! Thank you thank you for praying with us!