Thursday, September 13, 2012

Home Study Visit 1: Check!

I planned on blogging yesterday, but the day was so busy that I went straight to bed after dinner!  Of course, I didn't fall asleep until after 10:00, but that's beside the point.

For starters, I was wrong about my meeting with Le Leche League.  It wasn't yesterday, it was today.  Good thing, because I did not have time for a meeting yesterday!  I cleaned the apartment, frantically searched for something appropriate to wear for the occasion (thanks to all who helped!  I went with comfy and cozy...but no yoga pants, unfortunately...and was complimented on my outfit at the end of the meeting...that's an added plus).  

The Home Study went well.  It started off a little...uncomfortable?  I'm such a hostess that I felt akward without my kitchen, my own dishes, and the accessibility to do what I like to do so much and cater to people who visit my home!  I didn't even feel at home.  I missed my big house in Iowa that has so much space and I suddenly felt disconnected.  Adam sensed my discomfort and did an amazing job of leading conversation until I was at ease.  It's not like me to be uncomfortable in social situations so I was worried about sending off a bad "vibe".  I think I ended up okay, though.  By the time she left I was talking a million words a minute while she frantically took notes on her baby pink paper that was designated for me.  [Adam's paper is baby blue...interesting.  And kinda cute:)]

I think Adam and I were both a little nervous about the meeting and where things might go.  Sure enough, our entire lives were revealed (once again) and we were asked a million questions about our relationship, past relationships, our families, our histories, etc.  We are confident enough in who we are, where we've been, and how it has shaped us, that I can boldly say we owned that interview.  I'm not sure if Adam feels that way, but he seemed confident enough with everything.  He was a little preoccupied (hang on, I'll get there in a minute).  As far as sharing the experience with you....it was everything I've shared about paperwork, just in person, really.  She asked us about our jobs and drew a diagram that represented each of us, our work hours, hobbies, ages, and the like.  We talked about how work hours might change for both of us when a baby arrives (Wait.  You mean our schedule is gonna change?  I hadn't thought of that...) After the diagrams, she pulled out the pink paper.  We created a family tree (which took for-e-ver for me) and talked about each member of my family.  She asked about temperament, characteristics, relationships I had with each one and their relationships with each other.  It was exhausting!  Actually, my family is so big, that she wants to meet with me by myself in order to finish my family tree.  We were supposed to have two meetings, three hours each.  Now we're adding two hours.  My individual meeting is scheduled for next week and I could complain about the extra time, but I decided today to stop complaining about any of this.  I haven't meant to sound as annoyed as I sound, and I'm actually really excited to be going through all of this!  I've let negative comments effect me too much.  I've been a little annoyed, but overall I feel so blessed to have the opportunity to adopt (finally!) that I need to focus on the positives and enjoy every single second of it.  It will be over before I know it!

So, on to Adam's distraction during out meeting....our realtor had emailed earlier yesterday with an offer on our Iowa house from a potential buyer.  He excused himself a couple times during the meeting so that he could work his magic with numbers and close the deal on our house.  HE DID IT!!!!  Just after our agent left, Adam accepted a counter offer and we confirmed with our realtor that we were ready to sign papers.  We're professionals at paperwork now, so I'm not even thinking twice about the faxing, emailing, and signing that is about to take place.  I'm so excited the house is taken care of!  We are moving next week, so the timing worked out perfectly.  Of course, my first question to Adam was if we could go for the bigger apartment we liked so much since the house is selling and we haven't moved yet.  But, he suggested we stick to the plan since we already had the ball rolling and the paperwork is finished.  I agreed the idea made sense and it would be nice to just save money while we wait to be matched with a birth mother.  We still expect things to continue to happen quickly, but if they don't...the longer we wait, the more time we have to come up with that $15,000 placement fee!  I'm sure we will end up applying for a loan afterall, but the less we borrow, the better.

On that note of timing, it looks like our last Home Study meeting will be near the end of October.  Part of me wants to move that up because we're so far ahead of our original timeline.  But, the other part of me doesn't want to stress to finish early...and I want to trust God on timing.  The end of October gives us plenty of time to settle into our apartment, wrap up things with the house, adjust to changes, and take a small breather after all the paperwork.  Once that last meeting is finished, we wait for approval of Packet II from Love Basket which can take a couple more weeks.  I'm okay with that report coming around mid-November(ish).  I can't believe I'm already looking at the calendar for November.  This year is flying by since we moved!  Sheesh.  I'm going blink one more time and it will be Christmas!  Ooooh.  That's exciting! :)

I heard back from both grandmas and our birth certificates and marriage license have been received and hand delivered to Love basket!  I'm so happy I was able to delegate that task!  It seems small, but it was such a big help.  Thanks, Mom and Mom L! :)

I attended my LLL meeting this morning and loved it!  I had to duck out a little early to make my next appointment, but the atmosphere was wonderful.  Each mom was supportive of my "mom status" and a couple of them were excited to hear what updates I will have next month.  I was given several resources, from books to people, and can't wait to get started on that stuff!  When I updated my blog the other night, I realized that only the home pages functions the way it does-where I can post entries, label them, and what have you.  So, I may be linking to a separate blog regarding adoptive breastfeeding and just deleting that page on this blog.  We will see.  I don't want to get ahead of myself and plan more than I can follow through with!  So, if that page is annoying to follow...hang in there.

Today I plan to get our online class figured out, organize my copies of the paperwork we've recently sent in, and prep myself for the weekend.  I'm hoping to finish paperwork and be registered for our classes by Sunday.  IF that happens, next week will be our last week of paperwork, assignments, and turning in packets.  Of course, this goal may be a little ambitious, so I'm okay if things take a little longer.  But, sitting in that meeting today with moms holding new babies added fire to my flame.  I want to keep going.  I want to finish this so I can have my baby!  Last night's meeting led to a restless night of longing for my baby whom I haven't even met...who may not even be on earth yet.  It wasn't a sad longing, but a desire from the bottom of my heart, to hold my baby.  I want to meet him or her.  I always saw myself with a rollie pollie chub of a baby because that's how I was.  But now, I have no idea what my baby will look like.  So the image in my head changes over and over....which in turn refuels the longing.  Writing about it now brings it all back.  I can't wait!  The day is so close, yet so far away.  

I will update more tomorrow once I get myself re-organized.  We have the final pages of adoption stuff coming up, a trip to Davenport to organize the move, and then the move itself.  Thank goodness I had the sense to plan a weekend away with my best friend!  Not only that...I had forgotten about a week of vacation coming up at work.  Soooo, our weekend away, meeting halfway between here and Denver, turned into me driving all the way there and spending a week just enjoying Colorado.  Paperwork will definitely be finished by then, and I should have us pretty settled into the apartment, so the timing for a vacation couldn't have worked out much better than this!  I will miss Adam after the first day or so, but I'm so excited to spend a whole week on vacation that I think I can fill my time enough to keep from getting too home sick.  And I just want to say, that I LOVE the fact that I get home sick when I'm away without Adam.  It took awhile to get to this point and its a wonderful feeling. :)

Little E just woke up.  Keep your eyes open!  I should be back tomorrow with more information!

Have a great afternoon!



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